England's approach to Australia's barrage of short balls was insane

Ollie Pope casually climbed out as he confidently hit the ball. Photo: Getty Images/Gareth Copley

It wasn't Bazball, it wasn't Benball. It was just mindless.

The way England batted from the moment Nathan Lyon hobbled off the field was the biggest example of headless chickens since the 1961 Old Trafford Test, when England were baffled by Richie Beno running in a circle. the gate on the last day.

And the main culprit was Ollie Pope. The player who was named England Vice-Captain before the start of the series was the one who failed to read the blatantly obvious match situation.

Pope was reported to have shoulder pain: the painkillers may have dulled his senses . Or to put it positively, the chances of Harry Brook, Zach Crawley and Ben Duckett becoming the next England captain have just been greatly improved.

England kept Australia on their toes as they scored 182 for one in response to Australia's 416 and Lyon limped off. Except for a moment of Crowley's dizziness when he hit a stalemate, England hit in exactly the right gear, between third and fourth, winning singles when Australia allotted the field and odd four when they played themselves. keep playing the way they played to reach 600.

While Lyon was bowling from the kennel, Australia had little control. As soon as he left, the situation forced England to play low-risk cricket, step off the gas and let the Australian seamstresses tire.

Pope played right into the hands of Australia

Dad seems to have forgotten that the next test starts on Thursday . Put miles into the legs of Australia's three main seamstresses, all on either side of 30, and England's chances in the third test will increase, quite independently of this second test.

But no. The moment Lyon went to feed his calf, Pope started playing the highest cricket imaginable, stepping back from his stumps against Mitchell Stark and battling Cameron Green's bouncers. Common sense, risk assessment, the only thought of doing what Australia least wanted didn't seem to factor into his calculations.

England vows to continue taking on Australia's shortball flurry

Australian captain Pat Cummins began positioning his entire field to catch short balls, which England picked up, pulled, pushed and tossed in their grateful direction. It wasn't England hooking with two outers, it was England hooking every Australian fielder, and often there was no fielder after the bowler.

As if England weren't watching Steve Smith and his risk assessment as he hit his 32nd hundred. He demonstrated to the kids of the T20 era that it took mechanisms to create a test hundred against a good attack: Smith started fast, hitting his first 25 out of 14 balls, and then sitting while the English bowlers and ball aged.

Instead, Pope decided to do what Australia wanted most: England accepted their invitation to join the bouncer war. This was the only way Australia could take fast wickets in the absence of a bowling spinner; and that was the only way England could lose fast wickets. And so they did.

Australia really needed it.pic.twitter.com/RgL32QlVUs

— Telegraph Cricket (@telecricket) June 29, 2023

Duckett was less guilty than Pope. Ideally, Duckett would just crouch and sway while the Aussie fast bowlers bore themselves with the extra effort of the bouncers, but that's not his way. The only balls he didn't play were a too-tall bouncer and a too-wide off-break — only the 13th and 14th balls of his Test that he «left». Duckett is a compulsive cutter, a compulsive driver and a compulsive manipulator, as well as a compulsive prostitute and should be treated accordingly. He is also not in an official position of responsibility.

Joe Root received a reprieve when a ball ban was issued after he put a gloved bouncer on Alex Carey. So instead, he, like Brook, hooked on the square leg back, only Marnus Labouchagn threw his chance over the bar.

It was a remake of English light brigade attack cricket. It was a thrilling, exciting, compelling, but terrible sight for those who felt some emotional involvement. It was great, but not test cricket.

England had better conditions on the first two days. They were able to bowl on the first and second mornings at the optimal bowling time. They were able to beat when the sun came out shortly before lunch on the second day. And they failed to make the most of them. All credit to them if they win this test and level the streak after this explosion.