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    5. Pat Cummins transforms into a zombie captain with Midas' reverse ..

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    Pat Cummins transforms into a zombie captain with Midas' reverse touch.

    Pat Cummins looked like he was running through smoke during his fourth ash test. Posted by AFP/Oli Scarff

    The horrors that have befallen Pat Cummins over the past three days seem to have aged him by about 30 years, and his billboard-like face has turned into a mask of Baseball torment. As if recording a career-worst number of one in 129 wasn't enough, the world's best seamstress suffered the utter humiliation of watching James Anderson, number 11, who had little in his arsenal other than a backswing that casually walked towards him before knocking him off his front foot by four.

    It was a zombie show on the part of Australia's usually spirited captain, to the point where he and Mitchell Stark, two of the country's preeminent fast players, were beaten for 266 runs out of 48 overs with no girls in between. In every department, Cummins showed the other side of Midas. From a slap in the face to being smashed into every corner by Johnny Bairstow, he led such a toothless attack that six England players reached half a century.

    His exposure was on the verge of inexcusable. When Moin Ali kicked the ball into the middle, Cummins failed to catch it in the sun by taking a couple of steps in the wrong direction, surprising Steve Smith. All this created the impression that the team lacked a leader. “Historically, when you look down on an Australian team, you know who the captain is, be it Mark Taylor, Allan Border, Ricky Ponting or Steve Waugh,” Nasser Hussain said. “Look here and you'll see a lot of cricketers waving their arms around trying to help the Cummins.” face at Old Trafford. Photo: Getty Images/Gareth Copley

    None of this should irrevocably annul his authority. Ultimately, Cummins lifted Australia to Testing world champion status by winning 11 of the 19 matches he managed. But here in Manchester, playing his fifth Test in six weeks, he looked like a man running on a fumes. Bairstow broke it into a six, so huge that it almost hit Didsbury. His three most expensive Test spells, in which he hit 10 or more overs, came in his last three innings. By the end of England's relentless blitz of 592 runs, their highest home Ashes finish in 38 years, he couldn't even stop Anderson from milking singles.

    When did the Cummins rot start? It would be tempting to call the cricket furor caused by Lord's Bairstow stalemate a turning point. After all, he is still relatively inexperienced in the art of captaincy, having only made four one-day appearances for New South Wales before finding himself in the spotlight of a national role following the resignation of Tim Payne. Against this backdrop, being at the center of a major diplomatic incident that prompted comments from both the British and Australian prime ministers was an ordeal. And the reality is that his side has been in a tailspin ever since.

    He's all too familiar with the school of thought that goes from fast bowlers to ineffective captains. Mike Brearley famously articulated the reasons in stern terms, writing that “it takes exceptional character to know when to bowl, keep bowling with all your energy rolled into a ball of aggression, and be sensitive to the needs of the team, tactically and psychologically.” Cummins is, by any measure, an outstanding character.

    He endured the hardships of what is often described as the second most important job in Australia after that of Prime Minister, while in March he lost his mother Mary to cancer. But the brutal truth is that even devastating family trauma cannot permanently protect a person in his position from doubters. Unfortunately, doubts about Cummins multiply with every mistake he makes.

    Defeated by the onslaught of Buzzball, he is visibly exhausted at Old Trafford, alternating between tight pitches and slaughtering everyone at the border in a desperate attempt to stem the bleeding of Australia. He spilled catches, his bowling alley was ransacked and he saw England mock his placement on the pitch by purring five overs over four and a half sessions. While his terrible performance may just be an aberration, the product of weariness and confused thinking, his detractors will be in the mood as England is ready to level the streak, endure repetition.

    Cummins is an optimistic person who can tolerate criticism. Among his strengths is humility, the ability to never succumb to the corrosive aspects of fame. When he started dating Becky, the young woman from Harrogate who is now his wife, he only told her that he was a student at the University of Technology Sydney. It wasn't until she walked past a branch of Kentucky Fried Chicken and saw his face taped to the window that she realized he was also a fairly skilled cricketer.

    There's an argument that genius can be overstated, and that instead of modeling seaweed sweatshirts to save the planet, Cummins should capture some of the growls of their predecessors. But malice is not in his nature. The image of a good guy will remain, even if his captain's posture is shaken. Whether the patience of his compatriots will be enough for the same period is a completely different question.

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