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Stuart Broad's resignation has left me destitute, but luckily he's not going anywhere.

Stuart Broad's vicar-like outfit from his days as an expert caused a storm on Twitter. Photo: Sky Sports Cricket

Shortly after the great man hit his last ball for six, the Twitter account «Playing Stuart Broad?» delivered his final message: «Stuart Broad, not out forever, won't hit again.» I can honestly say that I feel empty.

This guy gave everything, not only in the service of the England cricket team, but in being an absolute laugh riot to follow both on and off the pitch.

He was the most observant player of his era, one of the most gifted breeders, emotional, at times irritable, funny, self-absorbed, calculating, passionate, theatrical. Thank God he's English; whether he's Australian or South African, you never get tired of slapping that headbanded cherubic face.

When cricket's best all-round artist leaves the stage for the last time, the only lone crumb of comfort offered today is knowing what the question is «Stuart Broad on TV?» will probably answer in the affirmative for many, many years to come.

The surprise announcement of his departure on Sky Sports was both a typical Brodian moment and a hint that we'll be seeing him in large numbers on the organization's coverage. He has already shown great promise as a sports pundit, for example collaborating with Sky on his last winter tour of England while he was on parental leave.

TIME 🚨: Stuart Broad announces he will retire from cricket after Ashes ends. pic.twitter.com/dNv8EZ0qnC

— Sky Sports Cricket (@SkyCricket) July 29, 2023

This confirmed the impression already formed from his previous comments that he would be a shrewd analyst, unafraid to speak his mind and confident on screen.

He also performed his TV duties in a gorgeous eccentric series of outfits: one corduroy suit, another burgundy blazer and, most notably, one in which he donned tortoiseshell owl glasses with his grandfather. a collared shirt that gives him the air of a young priest whose repressed passions scandalously tear apart a sleepy Edwardian rectory.

Handsome, and with a pop star fiancée, he'll have plenty of opportunities besides cricket if he wants to try his hand at being a popular celebrity. With a wider media presence than, say, Graham Swann or Andrew Flintoff, he could also avoid the Bantersaur ghetto that humorous athletes are traditionally driven into.

Stuart Broad's fiancée Molly King, holding their daughter Annabella, waves to an Englishman from the stands at the Oval. jpg» /> Brode's headbanded cherubic face would be very annoying whether he was Australian or South African. Photo: Action Images via Reuters/Andrew Boyers

Michael Vaughn wrote in his Telegraph Sport column on Saturday that Broad rivals Lord Botham as the top Ashes performer in England and while Broad's heroism with the ball and bat on the pitch has been well covered elsewhere, it must be said that his resume of stupidity and provocation unrivaled, even Gorilla Guy himself.

Then just a few highlights. The refusal to walk when he hit the ball from behind in 2013 is an excellent interpretation by the English artist of a genre that Australians still considered their own. The time he took the liberty of giving out an arch, hinting at a press conference about the shame of Steve Smith's sandpaper.

When he bullied Kevin Pietersen. When they ejected him from the England squad during Covid and he vented his pain and anger in a passionate outpouring that played the role of a Big Brother member settling several scores in the diary room. Yell «Stop moving the robot» at the camera of the robot and then befriend the android videographer when he gets a small headband.

Full conviction that he got the wicket, even when no one else even suspected that this was possible. The headband, the theatrics, the way he cups his face in his hands and says «Oooh.» Saying «in» every time he landed his bat in a recent test match. For two and a half hours.

Tell Alex Carey, «That's all you'll be remembered for.» Trying to high five Jimmy Anderson and punch him in the face. Celebrappeal brand. Even his cricket mishaps were downright breathtaking: Yuvraj crushed him with six sixes, missed three run-outs and conceded the ball in the latest World Cup crash against a team of the best cricketers in all of the Netherlands. In triumph, in despair, in outrage: he was magnificent.

If I had to sum up the reasons for his observation, I would say that it is because he is an athlete who surrenders completely to the moment, while as well, and at the same time, appreciating the spectacle and one's own part in it, and being able to look back at it all at the same time. It won't be bat and ball in hand, but I look forward to enjoying it for many more years.

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