The Duchess, 39, revealed in the article, titled The Losses We Share, that she lost her unborn, second child in July.
Credit: AP Photo/Kirsty Wigglesworth
Baby loss charities have praised the Duchess of Sussex for speaking out about the “unbearable grief” of miscarriage, noting that it would help others “enoromously.”
Sophie King, a midwife at the charity Tommy’s, said the Duchess’s deeply personal account of her own experience, published today in the New York Times, sent a "powerful message" to others who have gone through a similar trauma.
Clea Harmer, chief executive of stillbirth and neonatal death charity Sands, said the Duchess had summed up the pain of pregnancy and baby loss perfectly, adding: “The sad reality is that stigma surrounding pregnancy loss and baby death leaves many parents feeling isolated, so it helps enormously when someone in the public eye speaks out as it lets everyone affected know they are not alone.”
The Duchess, 39, revealed in the article, titled The Losses We Share, that she lost her unborn, second child in July.
She acknowledged that the devastating loss was “experienced by many but talked about by few” and noted that that despite the “staggering commonality of this pain”, the subject remains taboo, “riddled with (unwarranted) shame, and perpetuating a cycle of solitary mourning.”
It is understood that the Duchess, who is coming to terms with her grief four months on, wanted to help others after coming to appreciate quite how common miscarriage was.
An estimated one in four pregnancies in the UK ends in loss during pregnancy or birth, an estimated 250,000 each year.
Other members of the Royal Family who have suffered miscarriages include Zara Tindall, the Duke of Sussex’s cousin, who has also spoken openly about the trauma she faced.
Miscarriage: Who to call for support
The Olympic medal-winning equestrian, who has two daughters, Mia, six and Lena, two, had two miscarriages before becoming pregnant with Lena, revealing that for a time “you don’t talk about it because it’s too raw”, adding: “But as with everything, time’s a great healer.
The Countess of Wessex, the Duke’s aunt, lost a baby in 2001, when she was airlifted to hospital from her home in Bagshot Park, Surrey, with a potentially life-threatening ectopic pregnancy.
The Duchess’s account encouraged others in the public eye to speak out about their own experience of miscarriage, including broadcaster Lorraine Kelly, BBC historian Tessa Dunlop.
Author Matt Haig, who was chosen by the Duchess to feature in her Forces for Change issue of Vogue, tweeted: “My wife went through a miscarriage two years ago. We were in Australia and felt alone. It was so traumatic.
“To grieve a future that wasn’t there. It also felt difficult to talk about. A strange taboo. It is so healthy and healing when anyone talks about this topic so openly.”
Ms King said: "Baby loss at any stage in pregnancy is one of the most heart-breaking things a family can experience — and as Meghan Markle said, it’s experienced by many but talked about by few.
"One in four pregnancies ends in loss, but it’s a real taboo in society, so mothers like Meghan sharing their stories is a vital step in breaking down that stigma and shame.
"Meghan’s essay praises the bravery of parents who share their stories, and those who prefer to grieve privately can still find comfort and connection in reading about others’ experiences.
"Her honesty and openness today send a powerful message to anyone who loses a baby: this may feel incredibly lonely, but you are not alone. Friends and family, doctors and midwives, all of us at support organisations like Tommy’s; we’re here."
Ms Harmer said their hearts went out to the Duke and Duchess and all those affected by “this cruellest of bereavements.”
She added: “The sad reality is that stigma surrounding pregnancy loss and baby death leaves many parents feeling isolated, so it helps enormously when someone in the public eye speaks out as it lets everyone affected know they are not alone.
“Going through this grief at any time is hard enough but the isolation we have all felt this year has made it even more difficult for parents whose baby has died during the Covid-19 pandemic and has brought back painful emotions for all those who have lost precious loved ones.
“Many people simply don’t know what to say when a baby has died. And because it is an ‘invisible’ loss many mothers go through miscarriage and may never reveal what happened to even their family or closest friends.
"But we can all make a difference simply by asking, as Meghan suggests, if someone we know is OK and by saying how sorry we are. The other person may not want to talk but they will know you care, and if they do want to talk it may be the start of a journey through their grief.”
The Duchess during a visit to the mothers2mothers (m2m) charity organisation that trains and employs women living with HIV as frontline health workers across eight African nations and advocates for an HIV-free Africa, in Cape Town, South Africa September 25, 2019
Credit: Paul Edwards/Pool via REUTERS
Dr Christine Ekechi of the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists agreed with the Duchess that miscarriage "remains a taboo subject".
She said: "It is important that we remove any stigma or shame surrounding this issue and adequately support families during this time.
“We welcome open discussion about miscarriage and encourage women to share their experiences, where they feel comfortable to do so. When supporting women and their partners through miscarriage, it is vital that we support them psychologically as well as physically.
"By supporting research into miscarriage, prevention and treatment, we are hopeful this will mean fewer families experience a miscarriage, at any stage of pregnancy, in the future."
Dr Ekechi said that understanding of why miscarriages occur and who may be at risk was improving but that the topic was still largely under-researched and the care for women and their partners, under-resourced.
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