There are familiar faces in the Saudi Pro League this season. Photo: Getty Images/Essa Doubisi
Think about the couple's reaction. Years ago, if you told your colleagues that you were planning to spend an August Monday night, watch Al-Ettifak play Al-Nasr in the Saudi Arabian Pro League. There would be confused looks, a quiet question if everything is okay at home, and maybe an email to HR.
In 2023, this is almost acceptable behavior thanks to the influx of a random selection of big-name footballers to Saudi Arabia. All summer they raced towards the bay in unpredictable order, as if they were moving along the conveyor belt of the old Game of Generations by Bruce Forsyth. Karim Benzema! Ruben Neves! Neymar! Soft toy! Allan Saint-Maximin!
Elsewhere on Monday evening, British viewers were able to watch the first round matches of the German Cup, the second tier of Spain and the Danish Super League, where Viborg hosted Hvidovre in a WiFi password derby. So it's no surprise that DAZN, born in London but owned by the Americans, has acquired the rights to Pro League for the next two years. His contract includes three games a week from the most lucrative retiree football village, one of which will always play Cristiano Ronaldo's Al-Nasr and two of which will either Al-Ahly, Al-Hilal or Al-Ittihad. They are now considered Saudi Arabia's Big Four and (checks notes) yes, most of the four clubs are owned by the Private Equity Fund. Hard times for all British ultras Al Raed.
It's fair to say that DAZN's coverage saves some of the expense, but for now it's just a simple connection to the IMG world feed with no pre-game or post-game analysis. Six minutes before the start, we were still watching the upcoming boxing fights. Suddenly, Sadio Mane appeared in the tunnel, and commentator Bill Leslie made a mid-sentence scene. Leslie sounded more subdued than in his familiar incarnation of the famous Premier League mic-holder, and considering he covered Brentford vs. Spurs on Sunday for Sky Sports, it's safe to assume it was a remote performance. To observe the type of «suffocating warm night» does not require knowledge of the terrain. We will need a larger thesaurus.
A knee injury kept Ronaldo off the pitch, so it was Steven Gerrard and Jordan Henderson against Mane and 10 others. Henderson is certainly a familiar face, although it was new to see him in his new team's green jersey and a few extra gallons of sweat. He is an objectively funny recruit on the side of Saudi Arabia, a small moon in a star galaxy. His best qualities at Liverpool and England were holding the ball, being hard-working and screaming. None of them fit skyscraper-sized promotional posters.
Jordan Henderson got into the spirit of things. Photo: Getty Images/Ali Alhaji
His case was not helped by the return of the ball in the opponent's half of the field in front of the first gate. Al-Nasr broke through at speed to the baseline, and then hit the ball back for Mane's serve. This is the kind of goal that doesn't need a rich football tradition, all you need is a Playstation 2 and a few weeks spent learning Pro Evolution Soccer.
By 42 minutes, the guys (and, as you might expect, they were overwhelmingly guys) in the stands were raising their phones with their torches on like they were at the world's laziest Coldplay concert. And that's saying something. The family were all dressed in the red shirts of Liverpool, with the exception of one who was dressed in green and jinsters from Plymouth Argyle. Does she know something we don't about the shocking arrival of 50-year-old David Friio?
Co-commentator Don Hutchinson mentioned concerns about the galactic trolleybus and whether it could hinder the development of young talent from Saudi Arabia. This is the 407th moment most of us are thinking about Saudi football at the moment, but maybe we could be more careful about how all of this will affect the next Salem Al Dausari? At least it put the game in some context.
Many feel that television coverage could only focus on sports without the need for myth-making and storytelling around it. Here's an example of why gaming stories matter. Criticism of the «farmers' league» of Saudi Arabia's top division seems unfair because the standard is credible. It's harder to get rid of the feeling that it doesn't matter yet.
When Al-Ettifak equalized after Al-Nasr goalkeeper Nawaf Al-Aqidi inexplicably dropped Henderson's corner, Al-Nasr players surrounded the referee in protest. It was the lightest push. Mane, smiling, reassured his teammates. He played at Anfield in front of the sad slogan on the billboards: «It means more.» This obviously means less.
Some believe that, unlike its aggressively expansive predecessor in China, the Saudi League is not going anywhere. Will we all eventually become addicted to the Pro League? Perhaps the process has gone further than it seems. This weekend I spotted a guy in the park wearing an unfamiliar yellow T-shirt, and at times like this my clinical nerd outfit needs to be shut down.
I wanted to start an objectively unreasonable conversation, but then he turned around to reveal Ronaldo's 7 on his back. An Al-Nassr shirt in the south London suburbs. The Saudi Pro League has really arrived.
The Saudi Pro League onward journey Will you be tuning in to the Saudi Pro League this season? Join the discussion in the comments section below
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