Several major rivalries are missing from the illustration. Photo: Wimbledon
How did you feel when you saw the Wimbledon picture disparaging Andy Murray? Horrified? Enjoyed? Or so pissed off that you stuck your foot in your tablet or mobile device and sent the bill to the All England Lawn Tennis Club? There can be no neutral.
There is little doubt about the opinion of the Murray family, especially Andy's uncle Niall Erskine, who called the picture «Terrible in every way, everything about the people at the forefront and your own British story maker is nowhere to be seen. You should be ashamed of yourself.» Damn it.
Jamie's brother was just as unimpressed, if not on the same level as Mr Erskine, but we can all agree that the artwork in question suffers the most from not being very good. Antiseptic and sentimental at the same time, it is in the same style as elementary school textbooks as a gentle introduction to sex.
The procession of Wimbledon's greats (and fourth-rounders Yannick Sinner and Carlos Alcaraz) down the steps of the club looks oddly harmonious, but there's also something unsettling about it, like they're boarding a spaceship that they don't realize is going to blow them up. into the center of the sun.
Some horror at the inclusion of Novak Djokovic, given his fringe views on all sorts of issues, and Boris Becker, given his recent spell in Her/His Majesty's Pleasure. Perhaps the artist and Wimbledon will change their mind and draw Murray over one of them, like Paulie Walnuts making Tony Soprano a general next to his tragic horse?
But does Murray really deserve a place in Wimbledon's Greatest Rivals? Compositionally, it would be difficult for you to fit into it, unless Djokovic, Rafael Nadal and Roger Federer are not ready to descend the four of them down stairs that usually only fit one adult at a time.
The real problem is that there are bigger rivalries than those involving Murray or any of his Big Four colleagues that have also been overlooked. That era of men's tennis raised the standard, but serious rivalry can only be one-on-one. Why not Pete Sampras against Andre Agassi, Steffi Graf against Monica Seles or Djokovic against sliced white bread?
Perhaps the next picture will be devoted to more intense Wimbledon matches. Stay tuned for next week: Tim Henman hits a girl with a ball, Jeff Tarango yells at the referee, Arancha Sanchez Vicario hits Cliff Richard with a lamp. It would be more in line with the angry tenor expected from promotional material these days, much more than this strangely pale image of apparent deadly enemies putting aside their differences and complementing each other in their beautiful white outfits.
A photo of the rivals — one of a series of works by digital artist Grant Grünhaupt, also behind the more aesthetically pleasing work unveiled last week and dedicated to the tournament's trailblazers. Murray didn't get involved either, despite blazing the rarest trail of all: he was British and actually managed to win the case. Don't tell your uncle.
It's important to remember that the staircase image only exists online. Those arriving at SW19 a week from now won't see this piece of art wrapped around Center Court or Claire Balding's microphone. This is a piece of work reserved exclusively for some well-read social media channels and not for any large public space. And it turns any anger about it into a storm in an orange cup.
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