1How many social networks are you on?Three. Instagram, Pandora and Snapchat. The others are for old squares.Five. Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram, Facebook and Vine. Wait, is Tinder one too?Also five. LinkedIn, Pinterest, Twitter, Facebook and Google+. Definitely not Ashley Madison, honest.Just Facebook. Are there others? How ghastly.2When you share pictures, what do they tend be?Mirror selfies.Burgers, cocktails, holiday hotdog legs and smashed-avocado-on-toast brunches.Your kids or pets looking cute.Sunsets and gardens.3On which device do you most of your social networking?Your smartphone. It’s like an extra limb and you have a nervo if it’s out of reach or battery.Your laptop, which you whip out of your backpack any time you have a spare moment.Your tablet. Well, when you can wrestle it off your gaming kids.Your desktop computer, clearly. What else could you use?4What was the first social network you ever joined?Facebook. IKR? Maje cringeface.MySpace or Habbo Hotel.Faceparty or Bebo.Does the local Rotary Club count?5How many friends and followers do you have?HundredsThousandsYou’ve got no idea (or so you pretend).Mind your own business. Oh, you mean on social media? God knows. How do you find out?6Which celebrities do you keep up with on social media?Tay-Tay Swift, Justin Bieber and 1D.Kimye, Beyonce and the Beckhams.Nigella, Russell Brand and Barack Obama.Stephen Fry, Jeremy Clarkson and your local MP.7Do you use emojis?Duh, totes obv. Most of your social media posts are made up entirely of hearts, fistbumps and yellow cry-faces.You flirt and sext with aubergines and kisses, plus are partial to the nail-painting one and the smiley poo.The odd smiley face or dancing flamenco lady, but only ironically.Emojis… are they those Cuban cocktails?8What do you deem to be “oversharing” on social media?Nothing really.Sexy or icky health stuff. Anything else is fair game.Every meal, run or night out. Better to save it for the envy-inducing ones.Everything. You wish people would stop showing off.9What do LOL, bae and #onfleek mean?LOL srsly?Laugh out loud, babe and on point.Laugh out loud, which you try never to use. Either baby or babe, you’ve never been sure. You’ve made that third one up.Lots of love. No idea on the others. Speak properly, for pity’s sake.10What do you tend to share, forward and retweet?Hot pix of bare hench baes or clothes/shoes you’re lusting after.LOLZ, memes and ROFLs, plus the odd bit of self-promotion.Worthy political causes or broadsheet columns that chime with your worldview.Inspirational quotes on pretty backgrounds.
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