Phil Neville was sacked after Inter Miami lost to the New York Red Bulls. Credit: AP/Rebecca Blackwell
Two recent opportunities for the nation to enjoy a favorite pastime: making fun of the Neville brothers. First to Florida, where recently ousted Inter Miami manager Phil lost his temper at a press conference. Can I finish or will you interrupt? Neville asked reporter Franco Paniso. — Can I finish talking? he continued, apparently not having finished speaking yet.
«Good, because I don't interrupt your question, so don't interrupt mine. Show some respect. So… Sorry for the language. W… W, w…” Then, with a great comical moment: “Excuse me, what was that question? Ask me again, please, Franco.”
Inter Miami fans have seen something in their rich five-year history, but patience ran out on Wednesday night when the team finished last in the Eastern Conference. New York Energy Drink were DRV PNK stadium visitors (no idea) and won 1:0.
The stands chanted “Que se vayan todos/Que no quede uno solo,” “Let everyone go/Let no one stay,” then a sheet appeared with “Neville Out” written in a furious script. Even Phil's son Harvey got booed, but he's 20 years old and playing right back, it wasn't fans storming posh places and berating a baby. In Neville's defense, sorry DE-fense, he's the best coach in two-player franchise history.
Let's think about his journey to this point. After Salford City's 2-1 crushing victory over Kendal Town in 2015 with Paul Scholes, Neville was unexpectedly top of the England women's team. They flirted with glory at the 2019 World Cup, but his time ended with the team in rotten form, and in retrospect it got even worse when they were woken up by Sarina Weigman.
He took Miami to the playoffs in his first full season, but his American adventure came to an end when David Beckham fired his friend for football incompetence. Lionel Messi was tied up, which seemed to seal his fate in part. While some strange things may happen late in Football Manager saves, you can't imagine Messi getting instructions from Phil.
Inter Miami fans urged Phil Neville to leave, and soon their wish was granted. Photo: USA Today/Sam Navarro
At the very least, his scathing video was intercepted by one of his brothers, resurrected from an August 2022 interview with Dragon's Den dweller Stephen Bartlett. Here's Gary, a well-groomed bicep filling out a Zuckerberg neutral t-shirt, outlining the new «mini-retirement» idea.
For the uninitiated, these are periods of rest away from your usual home, often abroad, and a useful tool to break the monotony of work. Or, as you know them: holidays.
More than anyone else, Neville deserved his mini-pension. It's spread across hotels, politics, Salford City, education, and YouTube. His investment company is called Relentless Group. Never stop, never stop. All this, as you suspect, is caused by a deep fear of immobility, and such an appetite for life is, in a sense, commendable.
At other times, it may sound like a parody of LinkedIn solipsism and very early alarm martyrdom. The Wave is certainly meant to change this stuff taken to the extreme by Jake Humphrey and colleagues, and there really aren't big enough quotes for this, «world-class foundations». It's a little rum to enthusiastically attack the day as oneself, when most are treading water and a bucket of butter suddenly costs five pounds.
It also seems tedious. In the same interview, Neville spoke about collapsing during England's Euro 2020 round of 16 victory over Germany at Wembley. “After that, I went to the hospital, had a check-up and found that I needed to slow down a bit.” Looking again at the mini-roll about the pension, he can't seem to bring himself to say the word «holiday», it's forbidden, his Lord Voldemort. Elsewhere he says, «I think I'm a little tired of hearing my own voice.»
As Phil's once-promising managerial career went down the drain and even Gary Neville got tired of Gary Neville's surround sound effect, the Neville brand is on downward curve. But both of them are nothing if they are not stable. When they were 19 and 21 years old respectively, their Euro 96 spot caused an uproar, as well as clear favoritism towards the Manchester United players.
Slowly, the truth about them surfaced. They were extremely reliable and dedicated footballers and, by all accounts, absolute adherents of high standards. In other words, working together is a nightmare, but a manager's dream. Both seem to be slightly weathered now, but will almost certainly be back again. Separated by the ocean, their destinies and social positions remain intertwined.
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